Several years ago, as I read the Psalms, I realized that my worst enemies were internal, not external. Demons, attackers, agnostics, atheists, fighters and haters — all inside me. So I began to rewrite the psalms to reflect that. A few of my favorite Scripture quotes guided and encouraged me.
… set your hearts on things above…Set your minds on things above…Put to death whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed…anger ,rage, malice, slander, and filthy language…Do not lie…clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive…And over all these virtues put on love…Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts…And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach…with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. (Colossians 3:2, 5, 8-9, 12-16)
Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes. (Psalm 37:7)
Be still and know that I am God. (Psalm 46:10)
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. … When you search for me, you will find me; if you seek me with all your heart, I will let you find me, says the Lord …” (Jeremiah 29:11-14).
I began to do what I have called internalizing the psalms – speaking to God, and myself, about God and about the doubts and darkness in my life. I decided to record my efforts in a simple blog, through WordPress. And now, a couple of years later, I am expanding this blog to include some other things I write.
My psalm poems are based upon and with quotes from the NIV and NSRV-Catholic Edition. As I journeyed through the psalms and made them my own, I found myself more and more searching for the feminine, the womanly, the motherly in God. And so I have chosen words for God, including pronouns, that are either feminine or gender neutral (like sovereign rather than king). The proverbial Lady Wisdom revealed herself to me through the psalms. Similarly God revealed my worst foes to be largely captured in what I now call my terrible Ds: depression, doubt, discouragement, darkness, dis-ease. You will find me using that phrase, “my terrible Ds”, repeatedly.
To learn a bit more about my faith and spirituality, click here.