Psalm 89

Now I will set aside doubt and darkness
And I will sing of Your steadfast love and enduring faithfulness
For a moment, I will let myself feel the eternity
Of Your steadfast love and enduring faithfulness
As if Your promise to be with me forever
Means I will never again feel doubt or darkness or despair
Because You can do that
Because You are greatest, most powerful
What is my darkness to Your light?
My doubt to Your enduring faithfulness?
You quiet my raging fears
You crush my threatening doubt
You scatter my confusion
You created me, all of me
The quiet and the tumult
The faith and the doubt
The confidence and the struggle
The light and the dark
You created all of me
To joyously praise Your name
You are strong, stronger than my best strength
You are steadfast love to my wavering
You are enduring faithfulness to my wandering
You are my happiness
In Your light, I shout for joy
I exalt Your name all day long
I live Your righteousness
For You are my strength, my shield
You are my sovereign
You promised me that I am Yours forever
With You, I am safe, secure
Chosen, anointed, strong
So I thought my doubts and darkness gone forever
I thought my world forever safe
In Your steadfast love and enduring faithfulness
Because You are my Parent, my God
And the Rock of my salvation
In You I have forever victory
In You I have forever peace
In Your steadfast love
You banish my doubts, my darkness
You discipline my heart and mind
You end my struggles
You remain true to me
In Your steadfast love and enduring faithfulness
Once and for all You saved me
Forever, for all eternity
And I thought that meant I would know only peace
Only Your peace that passes understanding
But the doubts return
Discouragement smothers my hope again
My doubts, my despair, my regrets
My sorrows, my failings
Once again plunder my peace
Where is Your steadfast love, Your enduring faithfulness
When I feel abandoned and defeated
Old and tired, trampled and cast aside
When I ask how long
How long, great Lady Wisdom must I keep struggling
How long the darkness
How long the doubt
Has my joy in You died forever?
Where is Your steadfast love, Your enduring faithfulness?
Remember me, great Lady Wisdom, see me, hear me
I know that You have already rescued me
I know that
But I don’t always feel that, I can’t always live that
Sometimes, I cannot sing of Your steadfast love and enduring faithfulness
Sometimes, I am reduced to a single hope
Blessed be God, Lady Wisdom, in my life forever. Amen and Amen

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