Psalm 88

Heman the Ezrahite speaks for me, cries out
All those thousands of years ago, as I so often cry out now
O Sovereign God of my salvation
When I end my day discouraged, crying to You
Hear me, let my prayer come before you
“For my soul is full of troubles”
I feel like hell
I feel like I am headed for hell
Do You forget anyone?
Have You forgotten me?
Have You cut me off?
Abandoned me to the hell of my own making
In the dark and deep regions of my mind?
Ah, I feel overwhelmed and I fear Your anger
Please help
I don’t even like my own company
I want to rejoice and instead I cry
I want to feel thankful, not sorry for myself
I keep trying, really, God, I do
I try to come to You every day
But sometimes I think my soul is too deadened
And sometimes I think You are dead
Please help
Can I praise You from a dead heart?
Can I live for You if I feel like hell?
Now, this morning, once again, I come crying to You
Don’t abandon me
(Even though sometimes I abandon You)
Don’t give up on me, don’t hide from me
See my desperation, my terror
As darkness closes in over me, as I drown
Hemmed in by my faults
My thoughts are in darkness, although it is dawn. Amen

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