Psalm 23

The Word of God promises me that if I let God be my guide
S/he will take care of me, give me peace and quiet
Make sure that my thoughts and actions are righteous
So that even when I am overwhelmed by deathly anger
By stinking depression, by sinking doubts
I will be OK
God will stay with me, defend me, comfort me
Better than that
God will let me feel like I am feasting at a banquet
Relaxing untouched by the hungering dark
Overflowing with everything good and true
If only, if only, if only I could live like that always
Then surely I would not have to struggle so
Just to feel good, just to hold others in thoughts of mercy
Rather than thoughts of anger and disappointment
If only I could let God be my guide forever. Amen.

A pause here because although I can read and write these words
Although I feel that these psalms are true
Tonight is one of my times of darkness
When all I really feel about myself is unworthy
I feel alone and unloved, and what is worse,
I feel that it is right and just that I am alone and unloved
I feel this fate to be no more or less than what I have brought on myself
I am drowning in pity here
And I hate it
Come on, God, give a little, can’t You?
A little bit of rescuing is in order here & would be much appreciated.

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One thought on “Psalm 23

  1. It is such poetry, the hungering dark. Where did that come from, whose pen? And the juxtaposition of anger and the milder disappointment, well, such an wonderful true contrast under the same sad umbrella. Did you know about Psalm 51? Do you translate that one into your own special idiom? I liked that one, a Psalm of King David, and it must have been hard for him, in such high visibility, what a position in life. We used to sing about that psalm in the Ukrainian Orthodox Church. Thank you, Adrienne.

    Like

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